bm2
I'm still standin'
interesting email, whilst it may be a joke today, who's to say that it won't be the norm very soon........
NEW AIRLINE RULES
>>
>>
>>>
>>> Looks as if its the way things are going now.
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> Attendant: Welcome aboard Ala Carte Air, sir. May I see your ticket?
>>>
>>> Passenger: Sure.
>>>
>>> Attendant: You're in seat 12B. That will be $5, please!
>>>
>>> Passenger: What for?
>>>
>>> Attendant: For telling you where to sit.
>>>
>>> Passenger: But I already knew where to sit.
>>>
>>> Attendant: Nevertheless, we are now charging a seat locator fee of
>>> $5.
>>> It's the airline's new policy.
>>>
>>> Passenger: That's the craziest thing I ever heard. I won't pay it.
>>>
>>> Attendant: Sir, do you want a seat on this flight, or not?
>>>
>>> Passenger: Yes, yes. All right, I'll pay. But the airline is going
>>> to
>>> hear about this.
>>>
>>> Attendant: Thank you. My goodness, your carry-on bag looks heavy.
>>> Would you like me to stow it in the overhead compartment for you?
>>>
>>> Passenger: That would be swell, thanks.
>>>
>>> Attendant: No problem. Up we go, and done! That will be $10, please.
>>>
>>> Passenger: What?
>>>
>>> Attendant: The airline now charges a $10 carry-on assistance fee.
>>>
>>> Passenger: This is extortion. I won't stand for it.
>>>
>>> Attendant: Actually, you're right, you can't stand. You need to sit,
>>> and fasten your seat belt. We're about to push back from the gate.
>>> But, first I need that $10.
>>>
>>> Passenger: No way!
>>>
>>> Attendant: Sir, if you don't comply, I will be forced to call the
>>> air
>>> marshal. And you really don't want me to do that.
>>>
>>> Passenger: Why not? Is he going to shoot me?
>>>
>>> Attendant: No, but there's a $50 air-marshal hailing fee.
>>>
>>> Passenger: Oh, all right, here, take the $10. I can't believe this.
>>>
>>> Attendant: Thank you for your cooperation, sir. Is there anything
>>> else I can do for you?
>>>
>>> Passenger: Yes. It's stuffy in here, and my overhead fan doesn't
>>> seem
>>> to work. Can you fix it?
>>>
>>> Attendant: Your overhead fan is not broken, sir. Just insert two
>>> quarters into the overhead coin slot for the first five minutes.
>>>
>>> Passenger: The airline is charging me for cabin air?
>>>
>>> Attendant: Of course not, sir. Stagnant cabin air is provided free
>>> of
>>> charge. It's the circulating air that costs 50 cents.
>>>
>>> Passenger: I don't have any quarters. Can you make change for a
>>> dollar?
>>>
>>> Attendant: Certainly, sir! Here you go!
>>>
>>> Passenger: But you've given me only three quarters for my dollar.
>>>
>>> Attendant: Yes, there's a change making fee of 25 cents.
>>>
>>> Passenger: For cryin' out loud. All I have left is a lousy quarter?
>>> What can I do with this?
>>>
>>> Attendant: Hang onto it. You'll need it later for the lavatory.
>>>
thanks Tony
NEW AIRLINE RULES
>>
>>
>>>
>>> Looks as if its the way things are going now.
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> Attendant: Welcome aboard Ala Carte Air, sir. May I see your ticket?
>>>
>>> Passenger: Sure.
>>>
>>> Attendant: You're in seat 12B. That will be $5, please!
>>>
>>> Passenger: What for?
>>>
>>> Attendant: For telling you where to sit.
>>>
>>> Passenger: But I already knew where to sit.
>>>
>>> Attendant: Nevertheless, we are now charging a seat locator fee of
>>> $5.
>>> It's the airline's new policy.
>>>
>>> Passenger: That's the craziest thing I ever heard. I won't pay it.
>>>
>>> Attendant: Sir, do you want a seat on this flight, or not?
>>>
>>> Passenger: Yes, yes. All right, I'll pay. But the airline is going
>>> to
>>> hear about this.
>>>
>>> Attendant: Thank you. My goodness, your carry-on bag looks heavy.
>>> Would you like me to stow it in the overhead compartment for you?
>>>
>>> Passenger: That would be swell, thanks.
>>>
>>> Attendant: No problem. Up we go, and done! That will be $10, please.
>>>
>>> Passenger: What?
>>>
>>> Attendant: The airline now charges a $10 carry-on assistance fee.
>>>
>>> Passenger: This is extortion. I won't stand for it.
>>>
>>> Attendant: Actually, you're right, you can't stand. You need to sit,
>>> and fasten your seat belt. We're about to push back from the gate.
>>> But, first I need that $10.
>>>
>>> Passenger: No way!
>>>
>>> Attendant: Sir, if you don't comply, I will be forced to call the
>>> air
>>> marshal. And you really don't want me to do that.
>>>
>>> Passenger: Why not? Is he going to shoot me?
>>>
>>> Attendant: No, but there's a $50 air-marshal hailing fee.
>>>
>>> Passenger: Oh, all right, here, take the $10. I can't believe this.
>>>
>>> Attendant: Thank you for your cooperation, sir. Is there anything
>>> else I can do for you?
>>>
>>> Passenger: Yes. It's stuffy in here, and my overhead fan doesn't
>>> seem
>>> to work. Can you fix it?
>>>
>>> Attendant: Your overhead fan is not broken, sir. Just insert two
>>> quarters into the overhead coin slot for the first five minutes.
>>>
>>> Passenger: The airline is charging me for cabin air?
>>>
>>> Attendant: Of course not, sir. Stagnant cabin air is provided free
>>> of
>>> charge. It's the circulating air that costs 50 cents.
>>>
>>> Passenger: I don't have any quarters. Can you make change for a
>>> dollar?
>>>
>>> Attendant: Certainly, sir! Here you go!
>>>
>>> Passenger: But you've given me only three quarters for my dollar.
>>>
>>> Attendant: Yes, there's a change making fee of 25 cents.
>>>
>>> Passenger: For cryin' out loud. All I have left is a lousy quarter?
>>> What can I do with this?
>>>
>>> Attendant: Hang onto it. You'll need it later for the lavatory.
>>>
thanks Tony
